For Girls Only

Hmmmmmm...Do you ever just have one of "those" days? It has totally been like that for me today. The worst part is, it started out great. I got up and went to the gym, where I seriously worked my guts out! I pushed myself to the poind where I wanted to...I don't know...cry? I came home, kissed Scott goodbye, ate a nutritious breakfast of oatmeal and egg whites, sang a hymn, read my scriptures, prayed... I don't know where I went wrong. All I know is that I pretty much ate anything I could find with carbs (and not the good kind), and by the end of the day (aka right now, I have totally HAD IT with my kids. The worst part about it is that I really wanted to be a good mom today. Yesterday I had to work and I missed my kids. I decided to forget about cleaning my house today and take them to the park. It was fun, but why does my desire for patience slip away as the day draws on? Sometimes I feel like I am doing all I can to keep my head above water, and it is still not enough. I remember in October General Conference, Julie Beck gave a talk about, "Mothers Who Knew." I remember watching that talk and just taking it all in, thinking, "I want to be a mother who knew, or knows or whatever! I want to be that person!" I just wish I knew how it was done. I see so many of you being fabulous mothers to you children and I guess I missed something somewhere. And I just got mad at Scott, because he is trying to see what I am writing, even though I know he'll read it tomorrow. Maybe I'm just having PMS or something. I don't know. What I do know is that I just ate one of my favorite snacks and that makes me a little happier. I microwave string cheese until it is crunchy. I know it's weird, but I love it. Okay, DEFINITELY PMS!